BABY, IT’S OKAY TO QUIT… SOMETIMES

This morning was TOUGH…

Sofia made the decision to stop dance. You guys! that wasn’t even the tough part. It’s not that she doesn’t like it anymore (because she loves dance), or that we just don’t have the time (for dance we would always make the time), but she wants to quit because her teacher just rubs her the wrong way.

She went out of her dance comfort zone (only always done ballet) and tried something new, Hip Hop, however since starting the class a new temporary teacher was put in place. She was a little shocked at first as he was a HE, but eventually warmed up to it and thought it was pretty cool. Then over the past 2 weeks shes had some anxiety about going. She tears up at the start of each class, taking a few minutes to calm down (5 minutes) and then eventually goes in to par-take in the class. The straw however that broke the camels back was that last class the dance teacher came out and “chatted” with us in front of Sofia and the entire foyer filled with her dance friends and parents about her anxieties.

He went on to make a joke about her crying, doing an impression (a horrible one at that), saying “it’s like she thinks she never gonna see her dad again!” *insert fake whining*

Sofia wouldn’t look at him, had her back to him and stared at me holding both my arms sternly with huge crocodile tears whispering “sorry mama!” (break my heart). I brushed his comments off and left ensuring that Sofia felt no additional shame. Not wanting to make a big deal about it I didn’t further the conversation with Sofia, and knew she would bring it up to us when she was comfortable. THAT DAY WAS TODAY. She told me she didn’t want to go to Hip Hop anymore but wanted to revert back to Ballet. Since it’s far too late in the season I told her that she would not be able to join Ballet but could again in September if she’d like. I went onto explain why normally I wouldn’t agree to her quitting a class but that this situation is unique where she feels uneasy in the class and I would never wan’t to force her into something that makes her feel uncomfortable.

Although I’m SO SAD I’ll miss out on the amazing emotions that come along with a year end dance recital, I’m so happy to know that Sofia is comfortable enough to talk to me about it and confident enough in herself to make big decisions based on the way she feels.

What are your thoughts on children choosing to quit?   

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  1. I think at this age we have to listen to our children…well any age but especially when they are younger because this sets the “tone” for what they will come to us with when they get older. My daughter isn’t in dance, but she goes to weekly speech therapy. From time to time I knew she would act funny when it came to going to speech therapy. And in paying attention to the signs I learned that she just didn’ t mesh well with that therapist, which totally turned into him hollering at me on the phone…not only did I take her signs into consideration I saw it first hand for myself and that was the last time we went to him. The teacher sounds like he was totally out of line especially with the gestures, and I’m glad that she came to the decision herself. She probably feels like a weight has been lifted off her little shoulders!

    • Tairalyn says:

      Oh my Carissa, it baffles me on why some people choose to be child educators. Honestly!
      Thank you for commenting, I can already tell she felt much better after she asked me. Poor thing.

      xxoo
      Tairalyn

  2. Susan Gibbons says:

    I am definitely a big supporter of not quitting…BUT in this case I think it’s justified. This teacher just doesn’t seem to get kids – so really he shouldn’t be teaching them. She should LOVE her hobbies and she isn’t quitting because it’s hard, or she’s tired or she just doesn’t like it anymore. Her heart doesn’t feel secure in that environment…and I don’t blame her!

    • Tairalyn says:

      Thanks for you comment Susan, I agree this time different. I’m okay with her dropping the class and trying again next season.

      xxoo
      Tairalyn

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