Thanks for the girls night invite, as fun as it sounds, I’m busy… doing nothing.
There is an article circulating online right now that has nothing to do with a Kardashian making a drastic change to their hair, or Ann Hathaway returning her room service 4 times, and guess what, it’s better than both of those articles combined! The article is titled 6 reasons why my husband and I probably won’t make it to your event and seriously It has me feeling better and better about all my declined rsvp’s each time I read it.
After that baby arrives and you’re officially tagged with the motherhood title, so much changes. Other than the obvious adjustments within your new position, the once social life you had, well it gets the backseat treatment. What am I thinking, the backseat is full, it goes straight to the trunk. Your priorities change and where you once rushed out the door to meet up with girlfriends, you find yourself not wanting to put on a bra let alone get dressed up, you’d rather enjoy an evening on the couch with the man, even if that means a night double-tapping your way through instagram while he watches Sportsnet.
I once would give up sleep to be with my girlfriends, and now unless you’ve suggested a Starbucks date between the 3 hours that Sofia is at school and trying to avoid cleaning duties, you might as well just stick to getting updates on my life via social media. You see, I want to be the one my kids see when they first wake up and I want to be the one to put them to bed at night, these are my priorities.
I want to be the one that reminds them to eat their dinner and promises the world in return, to be the one who warms their milk before bed, reads them a story that sets the tone for their dreams at night and the one that tucks them in and listens to all the ridiculous stall tactics that keeps them up just 5 more minutes. I want to do it all, and I can, but this just means your girls night will have to go on without me.
The invites are appreciated, and a great reminder you haven’t given up on me as a friend, but for right now my social life is not a priority. The day that their 7:30pm bedtime no longer exists, when they don’t need snuggles before bed and when they can successfully brush their own teeth, that’s the day you can have me back, but until then, it’ll have to be tea on a Tuesday or Thursday morning and by 11:30am I’ll have to slip away, because I’m their mom.
Diana says
YOU!!! I love this!! You are so right and I hope this goes viral!! xoxo
ashley g. says
‘these are my priorites’… YES! this is exactly how i feel and often find myself feeling lame for wanting to be there with my son 100% of the time that he is awake. he’s kinda my world though and i remind myself that there is nothing wrong with that if it makes both him and i happy. it’s a relationship that i’m not willing to take for granted!
Tairalyn says
That’s the way I look at it, she’s happy, I’m happy, we’re happy, THEN I’LL DO IT!
xxoo
Tairalyn
Danielle Langley says
Love this blog post couldn’t agree more. Although with 3 now I like a break but that’s more in the form of scarfing a burger by myself in my car parked far away lol.
Tairalyn says
Mmmmmm burgers 🙂
xxoo
Tairalyn
Deb B. says
I’ve been struggling with this – and the guilt brought on to myself, and mildly imagined to be brought on by my girlfriends. I have such a hard time saying no and while I’m out and about for the 3rd time that week because I just couldn’t dare say “no” for the umpteenth time I’ve been invited (accompanied usually with a big-eyed stare via emoji clearing stating “you better not come up with another excuse this time”) – all I’m thinking about is getting back home, giving my little mama her promised nighttime snuggle, falling into my comfy couch, and playing footsies with the husband while binging on our fave Netflix movie. So refreshing to read another mama’s take on why our priorities are with being with our kids, and that it’s completely okay.
Tairalyn says
Ah man Deb my mama-heart breaks for you. I know this feeling so well. Actually TOO well. It took me a while to realize my so called excuses were not that at all, they were my priorities. Things change in peoples lives and so do priorities, if your friends don’t get that then too bad for them. I say do what makes you happy NOW, in due time that may change. Your baby will get older (oh god no!), your series will end on Netflix (nooooooo!) and then maybe your priorities will change to going out with friends. Don’t ever feel bad for setting your priorities the way you have. XXOO
Viv Sluys says
Yes! It’s not weird to prefer family over going out! They’re my priorities by choice too not just my priorities because I have to! My kids and husband at the 5 people I most desire to spend my time with!
Saba says
Sigh…? life as it used to be compared to what it is now lol