I was inspired to do this post thanks to Kate, a Blogger from Babble. She posted yesterday on why Mom’s need Mom Friends. After reading her post, I felt almost if life clicked again. I’m having a difficult time at the moment with making time for pre-pregnancy friends and I am giving myself grief for it. I knew that life would change after I became pregnant, appointments would fill my schedule, priorities will drastically change and possibly even a loose/gain friends.
What has happened thus far is fairly simple for me, and this post have verified that. My new schedule, priorities and energy level has taken me from my girlfriends I had pre-pregnancy. I am giving myself a hard time because when I used to say “yes – I can’t wait” I’m now saying “sorry no – I am busy” or “sorry no – 8pm is too late for me”. I hate saying no, I hate disappointing people and worst of all – I have regretted every “no” I have ever said to my girlfriends.
After reading this post – I had an “ah-ha” moment where it sorta clicked, and things didn’t feel all that bad anymore. My life is changing, I am a soon-to-be Mama now, I must not feel bad for things I cannot have any control over. I must take it easy through out this pregnancy and be smart about my time spent… This is why I have not seen my friends in over a month, and this is okay. Thank goodness for e-mail I at least know they are alive and well – I just have to be patient and take one day at a time.
Kate made a list on why one would need Mom Friends…you can see it here. I can’t agree more with her, however only being a pre-mom at the moment {3 more months and counting until Sofia arrives}, I decided to make my own list that make sense for me and where I stand in my Motherhood Journey.
Understanding: Husbands sure go through a lot during the 9 months with our Hormones and behaviors, having someone that understands why you NEED Chocolate at 2am and that agree that your are not being irrational when you want to paint the babies room not now, but RIGHT NOW! Having someone there that you can go to, and their answer is always “I know” or “been there, done that” – it means more than you could know.
Reassurance/Support/Guidance: I have gone through a few hiccups {if you will} here and there through out my Pregnancy, and I find having someone to be that go to, when the doctors calls for a random appointment – giving you 24 hour to THINK about what it could be about. Which by the way should be illegal, a pregnant women worries enough, giving us something to go off of would be nice. Being able to run to someone that you know will be there to either calm you down, help you analyze the situation or help in finding someone in the mafia that will help you “remove” the nurse who would give you no information about your surprise appointment. This type of friendship is very important to have.
Excitement: Their is nothing better than chatting with a girlfriend about how excited you are about life ahead. Having a girlfriend there who is going through the same thing as you make it that much more special. Giving you someone to get together with when you are on Maternity Leave. Giving your child a lifelong friend to grow up with, and of course giving you and your husband a sanity break – one day, when you need it most.
Mom Friends are there to cry with you, laugh with you, walk with you, enjoy 1 too many cupcakes with and be with you from the beginning to end. Make sure you open your heart and find a Mom Friend that you can trust in {I even found one of mine online}…. I promise you will be happy you did!
XO
Tairalyn
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